Musings of the Chronologically Challenged™ Fourth Generation
Saturday, March 20, 2004
>^..^< Larry, the Cable Guy would really like this, McGehee: Freedom Isn't Free -- But It Sure Is Fun
>^..^< "Serious Issue In Kerry's Past" -- The Monkey Man is watching this story develop. Interesting, to say the least. Linked from Say Uncle.
>^..^< "The Only Easy Day Was Yesterday" caught my eye at Chaos Central,, since I recognized it as the signature of my Navy SEAL friend. Go over and read this tribute to USA's SEALS.
>^..^< "They have a saying in the news business," Geraldo Rivera related this week. "Reporters don't report buildings that don't burn." Read the entire article by Mark Davis here.
>^..^< "A special property of the vernal equinox allows eggs to be balanced on end that day." Snopes says FALSE!
THINK ABOUT THIS..
A. The number of physicians in the US is 700,000.
B. Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year is = 120,000.
C. Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171.
(US Dept of Health & Human Services)
Then think about this:
A. The number of gun owners in the US is 80,000,000.
B. The number of accidental gun deaths per year is 1,500.
C. The number of accidental deaths per gun owner 0.0000188.
Statistically then, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners.
FACT: NOT EVERYONE HAS A GUN, BUT ALMOST EVERYONE HAS AT LEAST ONE DOCTOR.
Please alert your friends to this alarming threat.
We must ban doctors before this gets out of hand.
As a public health measure, I have withheld the statistics on
lawyers for fear that the shock could cause people to seek medical attention.
This "joke", is no joke, these are straight facts.
[Note: Eric says this is a favorite in his family of 'carriers'. I try and I try, but I can't tell that guy anything new about guns!!]
A little boy comes home from school and asks his mother for some ice cream.
The mother is having a bad day and snaps, "NO!". The little boy turns and runs into his room.
After a minute, the mother feels bad that she snapped and knocks on his door.
"Johnny, I'm sorry I snapped at you. Do you want to play a game or something?"
"Sure," Johnny replies. "How about we play Mommy and Daddy?"
"OK," says the mother. "How do we play?"
"You go upstairs and lay down on your bed."
The mother figures this is harmless, so she agrees and goes upstairs.
Meanwhile, Johnny rummages through the closet and finds his dad's hat and coat.
He digs in the ashtray to find a long cigarette butt.
After dressing and putting the cigarette in his mouth, he swaggers up the stairs.
There, on the bed, is his mother.
Johnny marches in, walks up to the bed, and says,
"Get your a$$ out of bed and get that kid some ice cream!"
[thanks to John, New Jersey]